January 8 – Working with the hindrances
Dear Friends, DaRa’s talk on The Five Hindrances looks at what the hindrances are, and then she shares a technique to work with them. So we’ll unpack that today and tomorrow. As we sit to meditate, we will certainly come across any number of challenges that get in the way of mindfulness and concentration. There’s a typical list of five categories of experiences that hinder the meditation – you might have your own variations on these themes. One think I like about this list is that it normalizes the experience. When we meditate – and in life – there are some habitual forces that will obscure our ability to see clearly and respond wisely. As DaRa mentions, these occurrences are not something we’re doing wrong or need to condemn. Instead, if we can turn our attention toward them, they become “the fodder through which we strengthen and deepen our practice.”…
January 28 – Short moments, many times
Dear Friends, As we near the end of January (already!), I thought I would share a few ideas how I keep my practice alive day to day… and invite some of your ideas too! One thing many of us may relate to is feeling like there isn’t enough time to sit and practice. That’s where I love this phrase, “short moment, many times.” Sharon Salzberg has mentioned it in a few places, including in one of her books: Q Can we benefit from meditation practices if we limit them to small pockets of time during the day, such as the commute to and from work? A Yes, we do benefit from small pockets of practice. One of my Tibetan meditation teachers counseled, “Short moments many times,” as a way to make progress in meditation. What I find personally though, is that if I have a period of time dedicated specifically…
January 27 – Ch-ch-ch-changes
Dear Friends I’m on retreat this weekend, but I’ve queued up this message to keep you company until I’m back on line on Monday. There’s a poem I appreciate from Kay Ryan: The Niagara River As though the river were a floor, we position our table and chairs upon it, eat, and have conversation. As it moves along, we notice—as calmly as though dining room paintings were being replaced— the changing scenes along the shore. We do know, we do know this is the Niagara River, but it is hard to remember what that means. https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/niagara-river Christina Feldman writes, We do not always realize how much we rely upon the great and small things in our lives to stay the same for us to feel balanced and poised—until they change. page 119 Andrea Fella has a short talk and guided meditation that explore impermanence. In the talk, she says that…
January 8 – Generosity
Dear Friends, Generosity is a favorite topic of mine. In studying and practicing generosity, I’ve learned much about qualities of the heart. Generosity is so much more than just a monetary exchange or giving a gift. There are many ways to give that we may already be doing – through our presence, and the way we are in the world. Generosity is a demonstration of the power of human connection. Sylvia Boorstein writes, Generous acts are a relief because they connect. They are always in relationship. They can’t be isolating. And generous acts don’t require some thing to give away. … including—in addition to material possessions—companionship, comfort, encouragement, and care. Pay Attention, For Goodness’ Sake, page 50 Christina Feldman describes that generosity is a quality of kindness that is encompassed in mettā. Generosity can be an antidote to fear – fear of loss and deprivation, and to greed. (page 33) She continues: With metta…
January 24 – Noticing the about-to moment
Dear Friends, The next aspect of phenomena we are invited to investigate are what are called the “aggregates” – a way of describing the kinds of “stuff” that make up our experience. The list of aggregates is: material form – like your body and the things your body senses (sights, sounds, etc.) feeling tone – as we already discussed, the pleasant, unpleasant, or neutral flavor of a moment of contact perceptions – the process that attaches a name to an experience (this sound = bird) formations – mental factors that arise, including the factor of volition consciousness – the cognizing function of the mind – that which simply knows Just to suss out some of these other items: Perceptions As we’re all aware, perception isn’t always accurate – the mirage of a lake shimmering on the highway on a hot summer day, or a faint hum that sounds like people…
January 21 – Why practice?
Dear Friends, The ninth talk in Andrea Fella’s Daily Life Practice Retreat from April 2016 looks at what we do in this practice, and why we’re doing it. What we’re doing is exploring wise mindfulness – knowing what is happening in the present moment while it is happening. We know that we know; we are aware that we are aware. Turning and knowing what’s happening in the present moment can be extremely powerful for us as it helps us learn about our hearts and minds. From that, it can free us from the ways we get caught and struggle in our lives. So this “ordinary” quality of knowing that we know needs to be cultivated with a particular perspective – to understand the quality of our minds, why we struggle. Andrea F gave an example that our attention to know anger (or whatever is arising) in the present moment as…
January 19 – Simplicity
Dear Friends, In the spirit of Andrea Fella’s seventh talk from the Daily Life Practice Retreat, I’m going to keep this simple. Her advice to the participants was to simplify things as part of their retreat week. The question she suggested they consider was: “is this necessary?” In our daily lives, we have to think. But sometimes we do stuff that’s “extra”. Andrea F encourages us to question whether a certain train of thought (e.g. planning a future vacation) is necessary right now. Another of her suggestions included cutting back on one’s consumption of media (radio, TV, internet, etc.), since that’s often a way we tend to get lost. So you can first question: is this necessary? And if you do decide to engage in some media, then she advises to really notice how it impacts you. Can you be present for that? How does it make you feel? And then can you notice how…
January 17 – When the cure begins
Dear Friends, The Q&A section of Andrea Fella’s sixth talk included some comments that certainly reflect many of my experiences. Do you relate to any of these? Take heart, you’re not alone! One meditator commented: In the moments that I have that awareness that I actually am aware, it’s immediately ruined by my judgment around the fact that all this time I wasn’t aware! Yep, I can relate! Andrea F encourages us to have perspective. This moment of remembering creates the opportunity to get more familiar with that experience of mindfulness. She encourages an attitude of curiosity about mindfulness instead of reproaching oneself. For me, I like an analogy from a positive method of dog training. Suppose you have a puppy that has run off, and then they come back to you. If you yell at the puppy because they shouldn’t have run away, the puppy may begin to equate…
January 16 – Recognizing mindfulness
Dear Friends, In the sixth talk of Andrea Fella’s Daily Life Practice Retreat, she encourages a practice of recognizing mindfulness, of knowing that we are aware. (Andrea F provided a handout to summarize the key points from this talk too.) In sitting meditation or in the daily activities, when we recognize that we’ve been lost in thought, Andrea F says that moment is a great opportunity to get familiar with what it feels like to be mindful. When we recognize what it feels like to become mindful, we start to see that it happens a lot through our day, and Andrea F says that this feeling of being mindful will begin to point itself out throughout the day. In the talk, she mentions a few things to notice when you recognize that mindfulness has returned. First, just that mindfulness is back. Second, you didn’t have to do anything to make it happen –…
January 14 – Just relax
Dear Friends, I’m going to share a bit of advice from Sayadaw U Tejaniya, a Burmese monk. Before becoming a monk, he was a householder and merchant, so he can relate well to the challenges that people like us deal with. Here’s a paragraph from the first chapter of his recent book When Awareness Becomes Natural: A Guide to Cultivating Mindfulness in Everyday Life: JUST RELAX The first instruction I will give a yogi who is new to this practice is to relax and be aware, to not have any expectations or to control the experience, and to not focus, concentrate, or penetrate. Instead what I encourage him or her to do is observe, watch, and be aware, or pay attention. In this practice it is important to conserve energy, so you can practice continually. If the mind and body are getting tired and tense, then you are putting too much energy into…
January 12 – Getting curious when the novelty wears off
Dear Friends, In Joy on Demand, Chade-Meng Tan describes four sources of joy, two of which he says are short-lived, and two which are “very important and highly durable.” The two that he describes as short-lived are the joy of novelty, and the joy of perceived agency. The joy of novelty is the excitement of experiencing something new, and the joy of perceived agency is “discovering that what you initially thought was totally beyond your control is something you can make some choices about.” The joy of novelty quickly wears off because the new thing quickly becomes not so new any more (e.g. ask anyone who got a new smart phone a year ago). The joy of perceived agency dissipates because we get used to being able to do it. As an example of these two types of short-lived joy, Meng told a story from when his daughter was about 3 months…
January 11 – Midweek recap
Dear Friends, We’ve covered a lot of ground these past few days, so let’s take a moment to recap. We started by talking about intention – setting an intention for the year, the day, a meditation practice, a chore – and we also looked at closing the day, practice, etc. with a dedication. We reviewed a few different mindfulness practices: Mindful of breathing (How do you know that you’re breathing?) Body scan Choiceless awareness (What’s obvious?) Walking meditation – both the formal practice, and a broader form that can be used in daily life We looked at forming habits with the cue, routine, reward cycle, and considered how we could find a cue for a mindfulness routine, and then notice the reward to reinforce that cue for next time. We also discussed noticing joy can become a habit, where we can stop, notice, appreciate, and share. We’ve discussed a couple of…
January 10 – A mindful chore
Dear Friends, How’s it going with your mindfulness-bell activity? Remember, the goal is not to be perfect. If you’ve remembered that you’ve forgotten, just notice what’s obvious now, say “I’ll keep trying”, and then carry on. The recommendation for the activity yesterday was something that was relatively quick and occurred often. The second project Andrea Fella recommended in her talk is to explore having a little bit of continuity of mindfulness for something like a chore that might take you 3 to 5 minutes to do. Suggestions include brushing your teeth, making your bed, preparing a meal, eating a meal. In this longer activity, the encouragement is to maintain mindfulness during the activity. For example, if you choose something like eating, to keep encouraging, “okay, I’m eating, can I be aware while eating?” During that 3 to 5 minute period, it’s likely that you’ll lose mindfulness a lot, and that’s interesting…
January 9 – Choosing an activity as a mindfulness bell
Dear Friends, In the fourth talk from the Daily Life Practice Retreat, Andrea Fella mentions that the tool of “what’s obvious” can work well in sitting meditation, but often what is obvious is not strong enough in our daily lives to help pull us out of our “habitually lost” mode. In our sitting, we have some reminders about becoming aware. She says if we’re sitting still and have our eyes closed, when the mind gets lost in thinking, we’ve got some physical reminders – at some point we’ll recognize “oh, I’m sitting still with my eyes closed, I’m not actually having that conversation with that person” or “I’m not actually in the grocery store” or where ever our mind has gone. When we’re in sitting meditation, there are cues that help us to remember mindfulness. And even then, you know how hard it is, how often the mind goes out and gets lost. Until we…