Dear Friends,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u0100nanda was a long-time attendant of the Buddha, and he’s one of my favorite characters from the suttas. He often asks the questions that we’d want to ask, or says the things that we’d say, and the Buddha gives a teaching to him – and by extension, to us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
At one point, \u0100nanda says to the Buddha, “This is half of the holy life, that is good friendship, good companionship, good comradeship.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Buddha responds, “No so, \u0100nanda! This is the entire holy life, \u0100nanda, that is good friendship, good companionship, good comradeship.” (SN 45:2, tr. Bhikkhu Bodhi) The Buddha goes on to explain that by having good friends, we will cultivate the qualities that lead towards freedom and ease of wellbeing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Josh Korda, the guiding teacher of Dharma Punx NYC, expands on this by adding in some of the evolutionary and biological support too. He writes:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Like it or not, this need for community is the nature of the human experience. So let’s look for admirable friendships\u2014they’re not just the whole of the spiritual life, but the whole of human life.
<\/p>https:\/\/tricycle.org\/trikedaily\/suffer-alone\/<\/a> <\/cite><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\nChristina Feldman relates friendship to mett\u0101:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In the cultivation of metta, friendship is turned into a verb—learning what it is to actively, intentionally, and consciously befriend all people, including ourselves, all events, and all experience.<\/p>page 36<\/cite><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n
Our mett\u0101 practice can extend wishes of goodwill towards a good friend. Christina reminds us “it is not an invitation to recall nostalgic stories or become lost in the emotion but a way of reminding ourselves of the intentions and inclinations that underlie friendship.” (page 39)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Here’s a 30-ish minute talk and practice led by James Baraz, which leads us through extending metta to a friend:
https:\/\/www.dharmaseed.org\/teacher\/86\/talk\/36481\/<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\nI’ll close with a poem from the Ther\u012bg\u0101th\u0101, a collection of short poems from nuns in the Buddha’s time. This one is from Mitta, whose name means “friend”:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Friend,
who has left home in trust,
take delight in friends.
Cultivate good qualities
to gain peace.<\/p>First Buddhist Women: Poems and Stories of Awakening<\/a><\/em> by Susan Murcott, page 37<\/cite><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\nThere’s actually a rendition of this poem that I like better, but it hasn’t yet been published. I first heard it on retreat with Susie Harrington and Ayya Anandabodhi this past June, but you’re in luck… you can listen to Greg Scharf read Matty Weingast’s adaptation of the Mitta’s verse, starting at about 53:30 into the talk here:
https:\/\/www.dharmaseed.org\/teacher\/229\/talk\/53516\/<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\nMay this path of friendship support you!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Warm wishes,
Andrea<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Dear Friends, \u0100nanda was a long-time attendant of the Buddha, and he’s one of my favorite characters from the suttas. He often asks the questions that we’d want to ask, or says the things that we’d say, and the Buddha gives a teaching to him – and by extension, to us. At one point, \u0100nanda says to the\u2026 Read More »<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[162],"tags":[173,179,137,174,177,175,143,176,41,178],"class_list":["post-484","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-jan-2019","tag-ananda","tag-bhikkhu-bodhi","tag-christina-feldman","tag-friendship","tag-greg-scharf","tag-james-baraz","tag-josh-korda","tag-matty-weingast","tag-metta","tag-therigatha"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/484","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=484"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/484\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1014,"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/484\/revisions\/1014"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=484"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=484"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.grzesina.net\/meditation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=484"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}